POSTED 6-10-07

There are rotisserie heroes and fantasy goats. But some performances are so ugly, egregious or plain perplexing that it begs the refrain: What the F--k! Here is Update's seriously twisted moment this week.

The arrival of Trent Green in Miami this past week marked the beginning of a new chapter in Dolphins football -- one without Dante Culpepper. After falling out of grace with Dolphins coach Cam Cameron and suffering a disappointing, injury plagued 2006 season in which Culpepper played only four games, the Dolphins are cutting their losses and looking to trade the three-time Pro Bowl quarterback. Barred from participating in team drills and lost among the Dolphins' overload of quarterbacks, including newly-arrived Kansas City underachiever Trent Green and re-signed backup Cleo Lemon, Culpepper has asked the Dolphins organization to release him, citing his long contract -- he has seven years remaining -- as a major obstacle in being offered a trade by other NFL teams. WTF! Only one year removed from signing him to an extensive contract, Miami has decided Culpepper's surgically repaired knee will not be taking the Dolphins anywhere but the bottom of the rankings and refused to release him, effectively prohibiting Dante's return to football for the foreseeable future. UPDATE! understands Miami is looking for something in return for the much-maligned star, but no NFL team would be foolish enough to trade for a 30-year-old QB with one knee, 11 games played in the last two years and a seven-year multimillion dollar contract. Culpepper was once a promising fantasy stud who regularly passed and rushed his way into top draft slots everywhere. But with no team likely to pick up his hefty contract -- or deal with his questionable durability (he was sacked 21 times in four games last year) -- Culpepper should be avoided during this year's draft. Meanwhile, the Dolphins have taken a page from the New York Knicks' playbook by taking a chance and signing an aging veteran (i.e. Jalen Rose, Steve Francis and Penny Hardaway to name a few). Like the Knicks, Miami will be paying for years to come.